Modesty from a mom's perspective

When it comes to modesty from a parent's perspective it's a whole new ballgame.  As adults we understand the social implications of our actions.  We can choose to dress how we want in public and are aware that certain clothing choices will make others make certain assumptions about us.  I'm not qualifying if that's right or wrong, but it's a simple part of life in this day and age.  If you put on a Dave Matthews Band t-shirt most people are going to assume you like their music.  Now, there are lot more difficult assumptions that come out too, for instance, like the photo Rosea Lake made:

Rosea Lake's "Judgements"

But my point is that as adults we make our clothing choices on our own.  Yes, it can be argued that our finances, culture, and physical location play a large role too.  That's certainly the case, but even within those limits we have choices.  We have choices to go with the flow or step outside of the box.  And we understand the implications of the choices and decide from there.


Kids are different.  They have no concept of societal expectations.  Running through a shopping mall butt naked is 100% acceptable to them until we tell them otherwise.  They're not thinking about what others will think about them, they've never heard the terms rape culture or modesty, they just know that sometimes clothes can be cumbersome, the day can be hot, and wind on your skin feels nice!

But they learn, quickly.  They're smarter than we give them credit for and can pick up on social nuances before we may even notice them ourselves.  Just to give you an example, my daughter has beautiful naturally curly hair.  Think a dark haired Shirley Temple.  However, most of those around her don't.  On TV and in books there are few curly haired characters, pretty much all Barbies and baby dolls out there have straight hair and every single mixed women or women of African decent I know locally straightens her hair.  My hair has some natural curl to it and if I put in the right products it'll curl up but often I'm too busy and just put it in a pony tail.  So, really, I'm about the only person who does wear her hair curly that she knows and it's made an impact on her.  She complains if we don't straighten her hair (we never actually do but her nanny will do it at times).  She says that her hair is not as beautiful as other girls with straight hair no matter what we tell her.  Let me tell you, as a parent it's extremely hard to convince your kid of something when all of the subtle messages in society tell you otherwise!

As kids age the barrage of messages that they get from society can be extremely overwhelming and confusing.  One one hand, we dress our kids in clothes that would be considered "immodest" on adults, we give them dolls who are dressed in even less clothes (see the Barbies below... I'm not quite sure who would wear that to go fishing?), and kids are not given the freedom of choice when it comes to many things dealing with their bodies (what clothes we buy for them, when they get examed by dr's, when we have to help clean them after going to the bathroom, when they can get piercings and tatoos etc).

Barbie and Stacie Go Fishing

On the other hand, many religions put a lot of emphasis on dressing modestly, kids eventually start making fun of other kids because of what they wear (or don't wear), schools implement dress codes, and preteen books and TV already start discussing girls who don't wear enough clothes, develop early or are more interested in boys in a negative light.

How motherhood changes everything

Motherhood is crazy to say the least.  Giving birth is probably one of the most immodest experiences in your life.  All the check ups, which lead to the final big day slowly strip you of many of your reservations about your body.  You're constantly prodded and poked and during delivery you have an audience even if you're stark naked.  Following all this moms who choose to breastfeed have to deal with being told to cover up and that their breasts are "dirty" when they're feeding their kids the way nature intended.  That's just the beginning!

Because motherhood splits your heart into many different pieces, one for each of your children and you have a little creature running around that carries that piece of your heart with him or her.  Your instinct to protect that little guy or gal can be so insanely strong that it'll push all reason outside of your head (yep, mommy wars exist for a very good reason!).  So a topic like modesty can be difficult.  We want to protect our kids with all our heart.  The thought of someone looking at our young daughter lewdly can be enormously disturbing and following up that train of thought with a child of ours experiencing sexual harassment or assault is absolutely vile.

That's why this topic is so tough.  Somehow the idea got into people's heads that clothes protect our kids.  That if we dress them conservatively, if they don't show enough skin that that's ok.  Unfortunately, that's NOT the case.  Kids are sexually assaulted due to availability, NOT because of what they're wearing.  If a sexual predator has access to them in some way or they are at the wrong place at the wrong time that's what causes sexual assault.

The last time I was sexually harassed on the street I was wearing a long trench coat that went down to my knees, loose blue jeans, tennis shoes, my hair was in a pony tail, and I had no make-up on.  This happened in Paris where I probably looked like a bum compared to the more put together Parisian females.  However, I was at the wrong place at the wrong time and a insane creepy guy decided to follow me where ever I was going.  I got to the subway and he stood their yelling at me in French (I don't speak French) and no one came to my assistance.  Thankfully, I was able to get away by faking getting on a train, which he stepped on to and then running away at the last minute.  But I share that with you here today to say that clothes don't prevent sexual assault, IDIOTS cause it. 

What are we teaching our kids?

A letter from a father recently went viral when Rev. Evan Dolive called out Victoria's Secret for their Bright Young Things line that is marketed at tweens to college age kids.  I can see both sides to this issue.  For instance, when he writes:

I don’t want my daughter to ever think that her self-worth and acceptance by others is based on the choice of her undergarments. I don’t want my daughter to ever think that to be popular or even attractive she has to have emblazon words on her bottom. I want my daughter (and every girl) to be faced with tough decisions in her formative years of adolescence. Decisions like should I be a doctor or a lawyer? Should I take calculus as a junior or a senior? Do I want to go to Texas A&M or University of Texas or some Ivy League School? Should I raise awareness for slave trafficking or lack of water in developing nations?

I want to scream, "Hell Yeah!".  I DON'T want my daughters judged on their appearance but I DO want them to focus on their schooling, their careers and how they can make the world a better place down the road.  That being said, The Lingerie Addict responded to the piece and I love when she wrote:

Lingerie does not always have to be about the boudoir. Yes, it’s fine if it is, but why aren’t we telling young women that you can totally buy that lacy bra and panty set just for you? No one else has to see it. You don’t have to be in a relationship. You don’t have to show it off. You can buy this beautiful lingerie and be completely, awesomely selfish about it, and wear it all by yourself. And that’s not only okay, it’s wonderful. Why are we scolding and shaming teenagers for their interest in lingerie instead of encouraging them to view it as another, healthy aspect of their self-expression and personal style?

That also gets a "Hell Yeah!" from me.  As a mom I fully expect to help my daughters find beautiful lingerie for them once they need it.  I know lingerie makes me feel confident and put together even though only my husband sees it (and he couldn't care less what kind I buy as long as I'm happy with it).  I buy lingerie for me because it's supportive and it helps my body image. PERIOD.

I don't think the idea of wearing beautiful lingerie and being an active, intelligent participant in the world compete against each other.  That being said...

There IS something that makes we wary about Victoria's Secret's ad campaign and that's the lack of choice.  Yes, certainly, there ARE other lingerie brands (and let me tell you my daughters will be well aware of them thanks to me!) but because Victoria's Secret is so dominate, so entrenched into American society it severely limits the choices to girls.  If it's the only major lingerie store locally, then what sort of choice are you given?  Soon the Bright Young Things line is THE line and young tweens are only given the option between plain white briefs from Target or panties that say "Call Me" across the butt.  THAT bothers me.

So few lingerie brands, especially full-bust ones market to the younger crowd that it can make it extremely difficult for young girls to feel comfortable buying lingerie, getting fitted, and finding items that they love and feel comfortable in.  Why do so many ad campaigns focus solely on sexy?  Why aren't there bras out there (that actually fit well) that have popular Disney characters or characters from their favorite books? Why isn't there a Harry Pottery bra?  I can promise you that it's not just the young teen crowd that would be interested in them...

So what's the point off all this?  Where do I want our culture to go in the future?

• I want kids to have choices.  I want them to have a DIVERSE group of role models.  That means characters in media and TV with a wide range of ethnicities, religious backgrounds, personalities, and ideas that challenge typical gender stereotypes.  
• I want kids to know that their appearance doesn't make them or break them as a person.  Bullying has gotten a lot of attention in the media recently but it starts at home with parents introducing kids to the idea that everyone is different and that's OK. Their friends might choose to dress more or less revealing than they do and that's not a reflection on them and it does not mean that they need to dress that way either.
• Companies need to be aware of what they are presenting to kids.  Is there a reason all the "cool" Barbies like the Dr. and Teacher Barbies are always white with have blonde straight hair? Is there a reason that Victoria's Secret can't come out with a line that has other options besides just sexy for tweens?
• We need to put our own assumptions asides.  As parents just because our child wants to wear a short skirt or have a nice bra doesn't mean that they are sexually promiscuous.  It doesn't mean they are putting themselves in dangerous situations and/or are ignoring their studies.  Also, even if they ARE sexually active as a parent you need to make sure your kids are aware of how to have safe sex, talk to them about situations that could possibly be unsafe, and teach them how to respect their partner's wishes. Listen to your kids and help them navigate tough situations.  
• As parents don't accept judgements based on outside appearances and discuss with your kids why this isn't acceptable.   Recently, my daughter thought it would be funny if her Superman action figure wore a dress.  She would put a Barbie dress on him and laugh hysterically.  When we noticed this we sat her down and explained that some men like to wear dresses/skirts and they wouldn't appreciate it if they were laughed at.  We also discussed with her how she would feel if someone laughed at her choice in clothing.  After that we noticed that in her play it had changed, a couple of days later she drew a picture of some friends and  she pointed out to me that a boy was wearing a dress but no laughter followed, it was just as a matter of fact.  

Sean Connery in a kilt is no laughing matter.

• Teach kids to stand up for themselves.  Even young kids can learn that people should ask permission (yes, even doctors) before touching their body.  Tell them to verbalize their feelings and if they don't like the way some treats them to be vocal about it.  I've considered even putting my daughter in some sort of martial arts class to teacher her discipline and give her regular physical activity, but also to be able to protect herself so she won't feel helpless  if she ends up in a dangerous situation some day.  
• Teach them to stand up for others.  I think this is one area where we, as parents (or even other adults in a kids life) can be good role models.  If you see or hear someone making fun of another person because of their appearance, blaming a victim because of their dress etc say something!  Kids pick up on these things and will learn from their role models. 
• Victim blaming is never ok.  We have to be aware of our words and how we talk in front of our kids.  Also, even if you as parents don't participate in victim blaming kids can be exposed to it at school or through the media.  Nobody is ever asking for abuse and our kids need to know and understand that.  
• Help your kids find good role models.  If we're only showing young girl Disney princesses, are we subtly telling them that only their looks matter?  If we're only showing young boys superheroes are we telling them that they have to be strong and impulsive for them to be special?  Recently a mom decided to dress up her daughter like famous women in history, which I think is an absolutely brilliant idea! Why aren't we telling our kids stories about these great men and women throughout history?  I know my daughter would love it if we had kids books that were just as beautifully illustrated and well put together as all things Disney about Marie Curie, Einstein, Martin Luther King Jr, Susan B Anthony, Rosa Parks, Jackie Robinson etc. 
• Work on a consistent message. This takes some self-reflection on our part but I think it's important to ask yourself if you verbalize judgements about others bodies and clothing choices in front of your kids.  If you're criticizing a women for wearing a bikini at a certain size but then trying to tell your kid that they're beautiful no matter what they look like, the message just isn't going to sink in as well.  That might be a more obvious example but subtle prejudices and stereotypes can sneak into our thoughts even amongst the most enlightened of us.  That's why it's important to teach children empathy too so that they understand their words have effects on other human beings. 

So how should we dress our kids?

I can't answer that for you.  A lot of it's cultural.  For instance, I was down right shocked when at the pool here  I saw 5-7 year old girls wear just panties to the pool and nothing else.  Brazil is a lot more laid back when it comes to young children being nude- especially at the pool or on a beach than what I'm used to as an American.  It's not something that has a clear right or wrong answer but I know I personally don't feel comfortable allowing my own daughter run around without an actual swimsuit at her age.  Then again, at least I can acknowledge that it has to do with my own upbringing rather than some crystal clear rules on modesty handed down from God himself. 

In our family we try to give my daughter as much autonomy as possible within reason.  Sometimes certain clothes need to be worn for practicality (her school prefers she wears pants, not shorts, because of the number of mosquitoes around) and other times I know she doesn't get everything she wants because I won't let her wear faded leggings with holes in them to a wedding.  That being said, even at a young age kids can have opinions about clothes, sometimes that are very contrary to their parents.  It also doesn't hurt to take a step back from our own obsession with modesty and allow our kids more freedom.

For further reading see: Am I feminine enough?

For other posts from the Modesty Panel see:

For more perspectives on modesty, check out the rest of the “Bosom Bloggers” posts. The links go directly to the modesty post if it’s been published, otherwise it links to the blog’s home page:
Boosaurus: Growing up in the Christian Homeschooling Subculture
Braless in Brasil:  What if you want more coverage?
Bras and Body Image: What I wear is none of your damn business!
By Babys Rule:  Modesty and Breast Implants
Contrary Kiwi:  More clothes = more holiness?
Fussy Busty:  Why I choose not to cover up
Fussy Busty Pt 2:  I’m fat and ain’t no one telling me what to do!
Hourglassy:  Stares Bad, Breast Private
Hourglassy Pt 2:  Feminism isn’t a four letter word but modesty should be!
Miss Underpinning: Why I like taking my clothes off for the Internet, or on modesty
Nothing Ever Fits:  What Modesty means for us
Obsessed with Breasts:  A Word Vomit of Thoughts
Red Hair and Girly Flair: It’s not your body
Sophia Jenner: Where do you stand?
That Bra Does Not Fit Her: We have a great selection of minimizers!
The Tit Rambler: Modest Panel Crashing
Thin and Curvy:  Dressing Modestly
Two Cakes on a Plate:  Respecting One Another Not the Rules of Society
Weirdly Shaped and Well Photographed: On Looking Away
Wide Curves:  I Want to be Big and Immodest
Windie Gardie: Modesty

The Modesty Panel: What if you want more coverage?

This and the following post were meant to be published this week but our internet went down and since I'm very overdue my ability to do much of anything is at zero.  Hoping I'm going into the nesting phase now! :) Also, this post is a *late* contribution to the Modest Panel and there will be a second on Modesty from a Mother's Perspective that comes out on Weds.

I've been meaning to tackle the issue of modesty for awhile now.  However, it's an extremely tough one and somehow I have at the same time too much and too little on it to say.  What you might not know about me is that I grew up in a very, very conservative Christian culture.  At one point we went to a church where it was "evil" to wear jeans, women were required to have long hair, and women were basically told that they should be seen and not heard.  Maybe that comes to a surprise to a few of you, since now I happily write about boobs, bras, and lingerie on my blog, but I've decided it's important to share so you understand my perspective.  For others who have discussed modesty from being raised as Christian see Boosaurus and contrary kiwi.

I'm going to go about this in two different parts.  This first section is for women who choose to dress modestly and later on this week I'll discuss modesty from a mom's perspective.  So often I see bloggers go against the assumption that women should dress modestly but then leave a blank spot for women with curves who choose to dress modestly.  To me there's an important distinction there.  One is being forced into a pigeon hole due to what society, religion, and/or family/friends demand of you, the other is choosing clothes that you feel most comfortable in.  If we can be accepting of those who wear skimpy clothes, or have a unique style, can't we also be accepting of those who choose to dress modestly without calling them a prude or assuming certain religious convictions? Hourglassy recently has a post on the tie between a large bust and looking matronly and I think these issues are fairly closely tied together.

Now, I'm not exactly the poster child for modesty. Rather, I choose my clothing items more by what I find flattering on my body vs. what society dictates I should wear.  For instance, I've been a fan of bikinis once I discovered bra sized swim wear because 1. they're more supportive, 2. they don't roll up over my rounded stomach, 3. they fit better on my long torso and 4. I can pee more easily in them.  That being said, I would prefer more full-coverage bikinis if it was possible.  I love the look of high-waisted bottoms and have I no desire to wear plunge bikini tops considering my swimwear is used for working out so stability is needed! On the other end of the spectrum, you'll never find me in a short skirt (well, I will wear one with leggings underneath) because I find that if flares around my large butt and emphasizes it more than I like.  I also don't like sitting that "lady like" and in a short skirt that would reveal more than I feel comfortable with.  I tend to prefer longer skirts and even the occasional maxi dress/skirts (even though I've been told like I look like a religious fanatic when I wear them!).

But I do think there's a need for women out there to get this discussion rolling.  Workplaces can have strict dress codes and Debrahlee Lorenzana was fired from Citibank for looking too sexy (see pictures of her usual work clothes here). I have to wonder seeing those pictures how they expected her to dress?

Debrahlee Lorenzana seem pretty work appropriate to me...

Other women choose to dress more conservatively due their own personal preference or maybe because they have certain features they would rather not be questioned about (old scars/stretch marks* etc).  Ultimately, it comes down to wearing what you feel comfortable and confident in.  That can change over time as you age, and your life experiences change too.

So here's some tips for busty women if they feel the need for more coverage....

• Invest in some Perfect Cami's.  Wrap tops can be especially trick if you're buying premade clothes.  Often time they are cut too low and end up showing part of your bra or more cleavage than you might feel comfortable with.  Perfect Cami's are basically mini-camisoles that stop at your underbust (so they don't add any heat during the summer) and they can also be great for nursing as I talk about in my post

Urkye Wrap top with Perfect Cami

• Buy Boob-Friendly Clothes. I always struggled with finding clothes that both flattered me but that also gave me enough boob coverage at the same time.  In the past I've struggled with shirts that were see-through (not on purpose!) over my bust because they were pulled too tight, shirts that were too low cut, buttons that gaped, and armholes that were too big.  All of these things can be fixed when you start buying clothes that are cut more generously in the bust.  Check out stores like BiuBiu, Urkye, Pepperberry, Campbell & Kate, DD Atelierer, AJ Rumina, and Ureshii Designs for button down shirts, higher cut wrap tops, sleeveless tops with smaller armholes etc. 

BiuBiu

DD Atelier

• Check out mode-stye for ideas (their facebook page is here). While I don't see a lot of things on there for large busts there's a lot of ideas on how to dress more conservatively without forgoing fashion completely.  Many of the styles are are very beautiful and I have a feeling could be easily adapted using clothes from the boob-friendly brands I mention above. 

This outfit could easily be completed with a Campbell and Kate white shirt, an Ewa Michalak nude bra, and a simply black circle skirt that Pinnup Girl Clothing offers. 

• Invest in a good nude bra.  If you're looking to wear a light colored shirt without your bra showing up then you need a bra that is as close as possible to your own skin tone.  I know women of color may struggle with this so I suggest they check out Ewa Michalak because they carry light beige, beige, and dark brown bras.  Curvy Kate also carries the daily boost in both nude (their term, not mine) and mocha.

Curvy Kate Daily Boost Mocha

•  If finding high enough waisted jeans and ones that don't gap in the back are your problem see A Hip Situation, Back Gap, and PZI jeans review.

All that being said...

Dress how YOU feel the most comfortable.  Ultimately, you pick your own style and should decide how much skin you want to reveal.  You're not responsible for others actions and it really sucks that busty women receive aggressive comments for clothes that are considered just fine on less busty women.  I wish I had a solution there but the reality of it is you are who you are and this is the body you were given.  Take pride in that and dress that way that gives you the most self-confidence possible.

For other posts from the Modesty Panel see:

For more perspectives on modesty, check out the rest of the “Bosom Bloggers” posts. The links go directly to the modesty post if it’s been published, otherwise it links to the blog’s home page:

Boosaurus: Growing up in the Christian Homeschooling Subculture
Braless in Brasil:  What if you want more coverage?
Bras and Body Image: What I wear is none of your damn business!
By Babys Rule:  Modesty and Breast Implants
Contrary Kiwi:  More clothes = more holiness?
Fussy Busty:  Why I choose not to cover up
Fussy Busty Pt 2:  I’m fat and ain’t no one telling me what to do!
Hourglassy:  Stares Bad, Breast Private
Hourglassy Pt 2:  Feminism isn’t a four letter word but modesty should be!
Miss Underpinning: Why I like taking my clothes off for the Internet, or on modesty
Nothing Ever Fits:  What Modesty means for us
Obsessed with Breasts:  A Word Vomit of Thoughts
Red Hair and Girly Flair: It’s not your body
Sophia Jenner: Where do you stand?
That Bra Does Not Fit Her: We have a great selection of minimizers!
The Tit Rambler: Modest Panel Crashing
Thin and Curvy:  Dressing Modestly
Two Cakes on a Plate:  Respecting One Another Not the Rules of Society
Weirdly Shaped and Well Photographed: On Looking Away
Wide Curves:  I Want to be Big and Immodest
Windie Gardie: Modesty


* Just to be clear, I'm not saying you have to cover up scars/stretch marks etc.  It completely depends on each women's individual comfort level. 

10 Full-term Myths vs. Reality

Now that I'm full-term and basically just waiting for this baby to pop out any day now, I thought it would be good to talk about the fun part of being full-term and just to clear up a few things.

1. Full-term bellies are BIG.  Nope, I'm not carrying twins and in the following picture I'm "only" 37 weeks.  I've gotten bigger since then but am WAY too lazy to take pictures:

37 weeks

It seems like celebrities and most friends/family who take pictures of themselves stop at around 7/8 months.  I think a big part of it is is sheer exhaustion but the effect is that many people are shocked to see a 9 months pregnant women running around and you get some great comments like "are you sure there aren't twins in there?" or one I got the other day was "hey big belly!".  They don't really get to me, but I know for some ladies they can find these constant comments emotional draining.

2. Nesting is a lie.  Ok, maybe some ladies get this but I sure don't! All I want to do is sleep but when I try to sleep I have to get up and pee all the time.  It's a viscous cycle and none of it involves cleaning every inch of our apartment.

3. 40 weeks is the AVERAGE date that women delivery, it's not the end date.  I found this cool like discussing some of the statistics (seems like the average is centered a day or two before 40 weeks regardless of number of previous pregnancies.  I do wonder how much that is affected though by women getting elective inductions/c-sections before or on their due date.  It would be interesting to compare to a country like the Netherlands where they have a very low c-section rate and less medical interventions.  That being said, it's OK to go past your due date.  Since roughly 40 weeks is the average that means HALF of all women give birth after 40 weeks...  Long story short, bugging your pregnant friend starting at 37 weeks every day when they're going to go into labor probably isn't the best idea unless you plan on keeping it up for 5 weeks!

4. Cervical exams don't tell you much.  I get it, I LOVE statistics so I find the whole thing fascinating but the reality of it is if you're at 1 cm or 3 cm it doesn't say anything about when you're going to go into labor and how long your labor will last.  Also, according to Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, she says that she's seen women decrease in size if they were put into a stressful situation due to whole fight or flight idea.  Basically, labor could actually stop/slow down if a woman was put into a stressful enough situation. 

5. My body still functions even if it's slower and bigger.  I had to laugh yesterday because I ran to the grocery store and the guy bagging my groceries first ask if I had my car with me.  I said no.  He then asked if I needed help carrying them home and I said no.  After that he looked at me like I had a third head and walked away.  But, yep, I'm still walking, still swimming.  Sure it's hard.  I'm slow  and I'm certainly not doing a fraction of what I was doing pre-pregnancy but I'm also still a fully functional human being.  I keep hearing that exercise helps to speed up labor, no personal experience there, but I'm sure hoping it's true!

6. I'm still rocking underwire bras!  Right now I'm right between a 32K and 32KK in Ewa Michalak's S bra (although I prefer the 32K in terms of comfort). However, I still don't get along with soft cup bras, so I'm hoping like crazy that my 32KK Ewa Michalak bras are the right size once my milk comes in.

7. Shirts are NEVER long enough.  Seriously, I think maternity clothes designers think we all run around naked once we hit 9 month or something.  Even at 8 months pregnant I ran into problems with most of my maternity shirts being too short.  Now I have basically 3 shirts that still cover my belly!

8. Pregnancy Uniforms become reality whether we like it or not.  In the picture above you see me rocking a variation of my pregnancy uniform.  Basically it's black yoga pants+ a stretchy shirt+hair in a ponytail.  It's not that I actually like black yoga pants that much, I'd rather have more colors at the very least! But at the moment I have 3 pairs in my closet- I'm pretty sure they're reproducing.  I swear it's nearly impossible to find these stupid things in other colors and don't even try to ask me to put on something besides them.  I'm ALL about comfort at this point. 

9. You gain the magical ability to pee ever few minutes.  Seriously, our toilet paper bill has got to be astronomical at this point.

10. Nobody answers the phone with "hi" anymore.  Rather, you get "are you in labor?" or "is the baby born yet?".  At work my husband has gotten asked this same question (baffling because why would he be at work then?).  I told him he should answer "Yes, June is in labor this very second and I'm watching over skype, you want to join me?".  Maybe it'll get everyone to stop asking. :)


Also, you can always use a good laugh.  As for me, I'm still laughing like crazy over the picture for a pregnant women getting off of the couch here. 

Housekeeping and help needed!

You may have noticed  that I've changed the blog design.  I wanted the blog to have a sleeker look and make it more user-friendly for readers.  I've updated my pages too so check out the Table of Contents, Resources, and Find bras that FIT.  I tried going for the dynamic view but it was giving a lot of problems with the comments so I had to give it up, sadly.  If the bug ever gets fixed I'll probably switch back.

I would appreciate some help, though!  On my Resources page I'm trying to create a list of bra shops around the world where women can find bras in larger cup sizes.  If you know any shops or brands (both physical or online) in your respective country  then please let me know! Also, if you are a lingerie shop that carries larger cup sizes let me know too in the comments and I'll add you! 

If you're a new reader, please take the Underbust Survey and the Breast Changes during Prengnacy/Nursing/Weaning Survey (if it applies to you).  The Underbust Survey has over 800 reponses and I've love to get to 1000 before I redo the statistics.  The Pregnancy Survey still needs more responses before I analyze the statistics, so please help! :)


Also... my due date is quickly approaching which means I'm just running on fumes here.  I apologize for sporadic responses to comments/emails.  I read ALL of them but sometimes have a hard time digging through the pregnancy brain to muster up a rational response.  Please just bare with me for the time being!  

Linda: Sugar Shape Leyla Review

Linda's back and has been kind enough to review SugarShape for me- a new German company that tries to get women into the correct size by just listing bras according to measurements, not sizes.  Holly also did a review for them over on the Lingerie Addict. 

Sugar shape is a German brand, which is just one year old. To be honest, I had never heard of them before until about a week ago when someone wanted to sell their bikini from them in a buy and sell group that I am in.  Curious I went on their homepage http://www.sugarshape.de/ to have a snoop around.  I was confused by their sizing, they do not operate using cup or back sizes like we are used to, but they only use centimeters. See more after the jump

So bras ARE necessary... when exercising

The University of Portsmouth is doing some AWESOME research when it comes to breast health.  They did a recent study that found that women (specifically long distance runners) experience breast pain among women of ALL sizes and ALL ages (for more info see here).  Unlike some other research, they actually controlled for breast size and women's pregnancy history.  They said that they surveyed women between AA and HH cups with chest-band sizes from 28-40" with a wide range of body weight where the average weight was 148lbs.  Oh, and they surveyed 1,397 women... a much bigger sample size! See more after the jump

Comparison of Ewa Michalak shapes

Just a short post today with lots of links and pictures.  I get a lot of questions about what Ewa Michalak shape works best for what body type.  The point of this post is just to put up links to other posts that compare the different shapes and how they work on different body types.  See more after the jump.